Couples: Philosophy of Love | Couple's Net | Chandrama Anderson | Palo Alto Online |

Local Blogs

Couple's Net

By Chandrama Anderson

E-mail Chandrama Anderson

About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

View all posts from Chandrama Anderson

Couples: Philosophy of Love

Uploaded: Nov 9, 2018
“You are open and honest in your philosophy of love.” This was in my fortune cookie yesterday, and is a great topic for couples. What is your philosophy of love? Are you living it with your partner today?

From what I see in my clinical practice, we all have ideals and look to fulfill those with our partner. However, I’ve noticed that each person’s meaning about many things is different; and often not talked about in detail. We assume we mean the same thing by our words and actions; and we may be hurt by words and/or actions that have specific meaning to us.  Often, our partner means something else.

I encourage you to be open and honest, first with yourself, about your philosophy of love, and then with your partner. Many people are afraid that “If only s/he really knew me, s/he wouldn’t love me.”

I would like to turn that around: If you don’t show up in your relationship as authentically as you can, then who is there for your partner to love?
What is community worth to you?
Support local journalism.

Comments

There are no comments yet for this post
Sorry, but further commenting on this topic has been closed.

Stay informed

Get daily headlines sent straight to your inbox.

Su Hong Palo Alto's last day of business will be Sept. 29
By Elena Kadvany | 20 comments | 6,210 views

Firing Judge Persky as a tennis coach was a big mistake
By Diana Diamond | 23 comments | 2,228 views

Premarital, Women Over 50 Do Get Married
By Chandrama Anderson | 0 comments | 1,959 views

Electric Buses: A case study
By Sherry Listgarten | 2 comments | 1,813 views

Natural Wines?
By Laura Stec | 2 comments | 1,731 views

 

THREE WEEKS TO GO!

On Friday, October 11, join us at the Palo Alto Baylands for a 5K walk, 5K run, 10K run or half marathon! All proceeds benefit local nonprofits serving children and families.

Register now