Are You Communicating More or Less? | Couple's Net | Chandrama Anderson | Palo Alto Online |

Local Blogs

Couple's Net

By Chandrama Anderson

E-mail Chandrama Anderson

About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

View all posts from Chandrama Anderson

Are You Communicating More or Less?

Uploaded: Aug 8, 2014
Isn't it true that everywhere we go these days people are talking, texting, scrolling and swiping on devices? I find myself wondering if we had this much to say before we had these devices? I don't recall being on our landlines telephones constantly . . .

And yet, is it possibly true that couples talk and communicate less now that there are so many communication devices?

Have you noticed that devices give couples additional mediums in which to fight? Do you think arguments via text and/or email is on the rise?

A few experiments:
1. Set aside time to talk and hang out face-to-face with devices off or in another room
2. Keep devices out of your bedroom (keep it for sleeping and sex)
3. Send lovey-dovey texts/emails to each other
4. Send appreciation texts/emails to each other
5. If you forget and send a fight text/email, follow it up with a new message that is aimed for repair of the relationship (oops, let me start again)
6. If you receive a fight text/email, reply after your defensiveness has dropped. Make it a step toward connection vs. continuing or escalating the argument (hmm, that didn't go well, let's start again)

We need your support now more than ever. Can we count on you?

Comments

There are no comments yet for this post
Sorry, but further commenting on this topic has been closed.

Stay up to date on local coronavirus coverage with our daily news digest email.

'A devastating impact:' The coronavirus claims Clarke's Charcoal Broiler, Mountain View's oldest operating restaurant
By Elena Kadvany | 25 comments | 8,829 views

The first few seconds after awakening; before I remember the virus
By Chandrama Anderson | 0 comments | 3,516 views

Can you stay healthy without making more trash?
By Sherry Listgarten | 6 comments | 2,933 views

Think about helping others in our coronavirus-affected area
By Diana Diamond | 7 comments | 2,671 views

Coronavirus Food Safety Update + New! Insider Tips
By Laura Stec | 3 comments | 2,376 views

 

DEADLINE EXTENDED

The 34th Annual Palo Alto Weekly Short Story Contest is now accepting entries for Adult, Young Adult and Teen categories. Send us your short story (2,500 words or less) and entry form by April 10, 2020. First, Second and Third Place prizes awarded in each category. Sponsored by Kepler's Books, Linden Tree Books and Bell's Books.

Contest Details